Author Archives: Larry

The Best Ways to Teach Your Kids to Respect and Value Money

Posted on by

Hello Larry,

As a parent, I have great concerns about my child’s ability to act responsibly with money.  It seems like the youth these days have a reckless attitude and carefree approach.  Any advice you can offer on how to best teach my son how to treat money with respect?  I am sure there are many other parents that read your blogs that could benefit from your advice.  Thank you. ~ Cory, Little Rock AK

Great question! Cory, I applaud you for wanting to educate your child to act responsibly with money. Like you, I find it amazing that despite all the value Americans seem to place on education in this country, the one subject that constantly seems to be neglected within most middle school and high school curricula is money management (e.g., personal finance). Because there is no standard education offered regarding money, the only real way most people tend to learn about it is by observing how their parents, teachers or friends value it. For example, if your parents are conservative, you most likely will be conservative with your money. If you disliked how your parents either saved or spent their money, you may decide to have the exact opposite view, which may explain why so many young adults appear to have such reckless and carefree attitudes about money.

As I reflect back on my own childhood, I am both amazed and miffed as to how or why nobody ever thought to discuss these important topics with me including my parents and teachers. Basically, I was educated by my favorite Saturday morning cartoon characters and fellow TV kids about how much better off my life would be if I only ate or drank certain types of foods, wore certain types of clothes, or drove certain types of cars. Like most kids today, I was taught how to spend money, rarely how to save, earn, invest or grow it.

To teach your son to treat money with respect, you will not only need to address the fundamentals of money (its value) with him, but also the importance of managing his own emotional relationship with it. One’s emotional relationship with money is really the catalyst for why most Americans suffer from what I call financial obesity, one’s obsessive and self-sabotaging need to constantly overspend and remain financially unhealthy. Like over-eaters, the financially obese allow fear to prevent them from achieving their personal and financial success they desire. Again, most young adults tend to learn about money by observing how their parents and teachers also emotionally manage their money (confidently or fear-based).

Children should be taught from a young age how to manage their money so it does not become all-encompassing or manipulative. Do not enable or guilt your child with money. They need to learn on their own how to become responsible with it so they understand why it is so important to save it and not be pressured to “keep up with the Joneses” by overspending to fill emotional and self-esteem voids.

To help your child understand the value of and emotions surrounding money, you might want to share the following analogy with your son that I share with many students:  Money is like an accelerator (gas pedal) in a car; the amount you save and manage is similar to the amount of pressure you can apply to your own financial accelerator. Good money management affects the speed as to how quickly you are able to reach your goals. The more you save and manage, the faster you will get what you want in life. To do this more effectively, one also has to be aware of reckless spending. Like reckless speeding, it could result in serious financial and emotional setbacks. Conversely, like experienced safe drivers, being financially aware of your surroundings (savings and spending habits) and driving within your own life’s speed limit (living within your means) will give you the freedom and opportunity to really enjoy your life’s beautiful scenery (family, friends, career, travel, etc.) without any undue pressure.

To help you get started with educating your son to respect and value money, I would like to offer you the following suggestions I share in my upcoming book, Growing Success: A Young Adult’s Guide to Achieving Personal and Financial Success:

1. To help teach young adults good savings and spending habits, I instruct them to create a monthly budget of income and expenses. The income could represent their allowance for chores performed around the house, etc., or money they earn from a part-time job after school. Their expenses should include: food, entertainment, gas (if they drive), cell phone, and any other items they tend to spend money on, consciously or unconsciously, on a monthly basis.

2. Take the time to explain to your son the importance of tracking and writing down each expense he may incur on a daily basis. When I was younger, I used to carry around a small notebook. I would write down the date, vendor, amount and expense category (food, etc.) of each expense so I could keep track of my spending. Your son will be amazed by just how quickly his money is being spent if he starts to track his spending. More importantly, it helps him learn to prioritize what he is spending his money on and identify his unnecessary emotional spending early on.

3. On big expense items, encourage your son to create a purchase plan so he can efficiently fund his purchase. When I was 17, I bought a new drum set. I did my research and decided that I wanted a beautiful walnut Gretsch drum set. At that time, the drum set cost $600. I can remember sitting down and figuring out how many weeks it would take me to buy the drum set based upon the number of hours I would have to work at my part-time job as well as what areas of my spending I would have to cut back on to help me purchase the drums. This allowed me to purchase the drum set while remaining within my means. This also helped me to learn how to manage my checking account more efficiently as well.

4. Emotional purchases and “keeping up with the Joneses” – It is important that you help your son create good spending habits early on. Chris Gardner, in his book, The Pursuit of Happyness, had a great quote from his mother, “The cavalry isn’t coming.” Parents who enable or encourage their children to compete materialistically with others are doing a terrible disservice to their children. As I said earlier, children learn their money habits by watching their parents. Prior to the 1960s/1970s, most Americans practiced good money management and spending through the tenet of WORK, SAVE, and then BUY. Yet today, we have been led to believe (as a consumer society) that we MUST HAVE IT, CHARGE IT on credit, and eventually PAY FOR IT LATER. What society and today’s consumerism mantras don’t teach you is that you really, really PAY for it later. Teach your son to live within his means and to keep his emotional spending in check. Train him to ask himself the following questions before making any purchases:

1. Why am I really buying this product or service?

2. How long do I plan to use this product or service before it becomes useless?

3. What would happen if I chose to wait another two to six months until I could truly afford to make this purchase?

5.  Encourage your son to save 10% of his monthly allowance or part-time work income in his own savings account. Set a good example. Accompany him to the bank so you can both make deposits.  If he starts this habit from an early age, he will continue this habit throughout his adult life. He will also see how his money compounds over time. An excellent book I would like to recommend is The Richest Man in Babylon by George S. Clason. It is a great resource for teaching young adults the lessons surrounding a respect for money and the value of saving.

On the flip side, allow him to spend or blow 10% of his money on anything he wants each month. You want his savings and spending to be habitual and sustainable, and not feel like a short-term diet.

6. My final advice for you would be to sit down with your son on a weekly basis and take the time to review his monthly budget and savings plans together. Take an active role in your son’s financial learning. If you feel so inclined, reward him with a small financial incentive by increasing his allowance, or helping him with a purchase by contributing to his savings for it if he actively manages his budgets and stays within his means. Positive feedback and support is the best advice for helping your son become a successful wealth creator.

Best of luck and keep me posted as you grow your son’s future success,

Larry

I’m Graduating & I’m Nervous about My Future

Posted on by

Larry,

I am graduating from college in two weeks and I am nervous about my future. What advice can you give me to avoid the most common mistakes that most grads make after graduating? ~ Ashley, Minneapolis, MI

Hey Ashley,

First off, congratulations on your upcoming milestone!

I can understand why you and so many of your 2013 classmates are probably feeling a little scared and uncertain right now. One cannot open a newspaper or turn on a television today without reading or listening to the growing concerns about the future of the U.S. economy.  In addition, there has been so much negativity and speculation projected upon your generation, but the truth is, these are incredibly exciting times for you.

Like the college graduates of the late 1960s who also faced an uncertain and changing America, your generation is filled with the pioneers of this new technological and global era. Sadly, many young adults today feel paralyzed and ill-prepared to become financially independent because the majority of their parents and teachers lacked the needed knowledge to impart such crucial information.  This might be what compelled you to write to me with your question. As a result, you are being forced to challenge and question the previous generational misinformation you have been provided, if any, in order to find new and improved ways to succeed and thrive on your own terms.

 ‘Emerging adults’ like you must now take the needed steps to educate yourselves so you can avoid the very financial pitfalls that are currently plaguing so many older adults between the ages of 40-60. I’m sure you see them in the world you live in every day, and I’m sure you don’t want to grow up to experience the same financial hardships.

George Bernard Shaw once said, “Life isn’t about finding yourself, it’s about creating yourself.”

If I were your university’s commencement speaker, I would offer you and your graduating class the following advice:

Don’t be afraid to dream and pursue the life YOU love. My philosophy for success is simple: “Do what you love every day of your life while surrounding yourself with those positive people that love and support you.”

The main reason why so many people seem to fail and never achieve success is because they either lack the necessary information and tools to succeed, or they simply succumb to their fears and never make any real efforts to ever get out of their negative comfort zones.

As I said earlier, don’t be afraid to question your “learned” negative fears and emotions. It’s okay to make mistakes and to ask why when someone gives you a suggestion or guidance. That is how one ultimately breaks free of their ‘status quo’ existence.

Unless you learn how to manage these challenges from an early age, they will become harder and harder to fix and correct as you get older.  

So how does one go about creating oneself for life-long success?   

1. Understand that there is a difference between a goal and a dream. A lot of people often confuse their dreams for goals. Unlike a dream, a goal will require some sort of action to be taken within a predetermined period of time in order to be achieved. Dreams are for bedtime; goals and desires are for success!

2. Do not focus on the negative! Nothing kills a goal or desire faster than negativity! You should never be swayed from trying to achieve your goals or desires because someone tells you “you can’t do something.”  You want to always keep your eyes open and see the reality you want and not the reality or shortcomings of others you are willing to settle for.

3. Create a specific action plan for achieving your goals and success NOW! You need to start by being very clear about WHAT YOU WANT to achieve and what specific actions you are willing to take to achieve those goals. You must take the time to create a vision and identify a purpose for your success and goals (e.g. action steps) in order to achieve the positive outcomes you are running after.

For example, to become financially independent, you must create a realistic spending budget that allows you to track all income you make and the expenses you have on a daily/weekly/monthly and annual basis. This will enable you to create good money habits from the start so that you do not overspend. This will also help you learn to live within your means. I also strongly recommend that you start to put aside at least 10% of your monthly income toward future savings.

Clearly defined goals will dramatically enhance your odds for success. It’s imperative that you start taking responsibility for your own actions and decisions immediately. This is the best way for you to grow your success so you can achieve your financial goals and avoid the very financial pitfalls that have derailed some many older adults.

Positively Growing Your Success,

 Larry

This is YOUR Life! Don’t Phone It In

Posted on by

Two of the biggest regrets I hear from a lot of adults today is that they wish they had listened to their own instincts and followed the life path they desired rather than trying to please others, choose a job, or lead a life out of fear. When they look back, they recall swearing to themselves that it was only temporary until something better came along.

Most of us come across these types of people every day: the server that looks annoyed when you take more than a minute to order your favorite coffee or breakfast sandwich; the cashier that has that glazed look in his or her eyes when he or she hands you your change without saying thank you; or the catatonic executive who spends his or her day unproductively staring at the clock or computer screen.

Sadly, most Americans don’t take the initiative from an early age to identify and pursue their passions, talents, or desires. Instead they often give in to their fears or misguided advice they receive or adopt from parents, advisors, friends, and others. As a result, many wind up ‘phoning in’ their lives by: mindlessly daydreaming about what could have been, feel they settled for less than they desired and now regret a life they never wanted, or, even worse, wake up every morning making excuses to anyone who will listen as to why they can’t pursue the life they once had a passion for. I cannot begin to tell you how many people wind up stuck in dead-end jobs/careers because they are: afraid to explore their true potential, desperate due to prior poor financial or life decisions (marriage, divorce, debt, etc.), or, even worse, are paralyzed by their obsessive need to hold onto material possessions (house, cars, etc.).

This is why it is so important for young adults to stop following in the footsteps of so many older adults (age 40-60) who suffer from what I call financial obesity, one’s obsessive and self-sabotaging need to constantly overspend and remain financially unhealthy as a result of a lack of financial education and personal development. To break the cycle, we must start encouraging emerging adults to develop new ways to succeed on their own terms by educating them with tools and resources during their early, formative years. This empowering education can help our young adults begin to make better financial and career-related decisions earlier in their lives that will positively impact their future personal and financial success.

As I discuss in my upcoming book, Growing Success: A Young Adult’s Guide to Achieving Personal and Financial Success, and in my recent blog entitled, “Self-Economics: A New Era for America’s Emerging Adults,” I address why it’s imperative that high schools and colleges must now find more productive and effective ways to educate young adults through enhanced high school and college curricula which I have dubbed “Self-Economics.”

The new curricula should include:

1. Financial literacy–which promotes personal finance and investing and the avoidance of “financial obesity.”
2. Personal development–a theoretical approach to learning and decision-making (which promotes “the power of why”).
3. Entrepreneurship–which encompasses many of the elements of my T.I.M.E. Model which teaches emerging adults how to invest in themselves rather than continue to rely on, or disappoint others.

By empowering young adults to make better decisions that will positively impact their outcomes and lives, they will be encouraged to no longer accept the status quo. They will stop choosing college majors or educational degrees that are not in alignment with their own passions, skills, or strengths simply because they have been pressured to do so by others. As they continue to grow older, they won’t remain in jobs that no longer inspire or fulfill them. They’ll refrain from accepting or settling for a job that is inconsistent with what they want, and therefore stop struggling, or, even worse, feel “set up to fail.” They’ll refuse to live in a sterile apartment, house, or location that feels more like a cold bus stop bench (e.g. waiting area) than a warm and stable sanctuary (e.g. home). They’ll also stop attracting what I like to call emotional parasites. These are unhealthy, dysfunctional people that often intentionally or unknowingly manipulate or use others for their own personal entertainment or distraction and who often project their own negative self-worth upon others rather than deal with their own self-sabotaging issues. 

To help you enhance your probabilities for success, I would like to offer you the following three suggestions:

1. You have the right to disappoint others – as I stated above: this is your life; don’t phone it in. It is time for you to start identifying your passions by trusting your own instincts. Once you have discovered them, clearly define your goals so they are consistent with your passions. Then keep your eyes open so you can spot related opportunities to pursue them. Re-affirm your intentions to motivate and empower yourself to take the necessary actions steps required to achieve the goals you’ve set and to make the necessary intermediary decisions that will lead to your probable (not possible) outcomes for success.

2. Like clothes, you may outgrow your current job or circle of friends. It is okay to move on and go against the wishes of others. Surround yourself with the people and experiences that will not only support and encourage you to attain the goals you have set, but those that will also help you to continue to grow. “True friends” will always support your decision to embark on new life experiences, even when those intentions do not align with their own. Other friends may not, and you will need to let those who can’t fade away. Always remember and appreciate those that have helped you become the person that you are today, but don’t be afraid to leave them behind if they can no longer champion your desired outcomes for success.

3. Most importantly, clearly define your goals. Your odds for success improve dramatically when you start off with a plan or written goals that you can effectively use to measure your future decisions and outcomes. I find it extremely helpful to ask myself the following question before I make any important decisions, “What is the probability versus the possibility of…?” This leading question will help you to anticipate whether or not your pending decision will support or hinder your overall plans, goals, and/or desired outcomes. It is imperative that you take responsibility for your actions and decisions from an early age so that you do not unknowingly set yourself back or derail yourself from achieving your goals.

“If you pursue something with enough passion, you will find fulfillment and success. Fulfillment is a choice. Be doggedly persistent in your pursuits.” ~ Gary Rogers (Productivity Coach)

As I often tell others, “Throughout your life knowledge appreciates, possessions depreciate.”  Don’t get stuck like so many before you in dead-end jobs or lifestyles as a result of trying to hold onto people or things due to a fear of losing them, a fear of change, or other fears you may possess.

Start investing in yourself now and continue to grow your future success.

Self-Economics: A New Era for America’s Emerging Adults

Posted on by

One cannot open a newspaper or turn on a television today without reading or listening to the growing concerns regarding wealth and the economy. Educators, news correspondents and politicians are going so far as to call our lack of financial education and debt accumulation a growing national epidemic and concern.

Scott Pelley of CBS’ “60 Minutes” ran a story on October 28, 2012 called “The Death and Life of Asheboro” which shared that since the year 2000 the number of Americans who worked in the U.S. manufacturing sector has declined from 17 million Americans to just over 12 million. That’s five million jobs lost in manufacturing alone in just the last 12 years to either jobs shifted overseas or closures due to the changing economy. Either way, many Americans in all sectors of the economy are now finding themselves down on their luck and forced to seek other means for financial survival due to these same reasons and others.

In my blog, “Can Making Mistakes Enhance One’s Success?”, I discuss how many adults currently between the ages of 40-60 find themselves in financial and personal turmoil, largely due to a lack of financial knowledge and planning created by their own teachers and parents before them.

In conjunction with current economic events and this lack of knowledge many in the Baby Boomer and Generation X groups acknowledge and fear, I have identified and continue to speak about a concurrent national epidemic which I call “financial obesity”: one’s obsessive and self-sabotaging need to constantly overspend and remain financially unhealthy. Like overeaters, the financially obese allow fear to prevent them from achieving the personal and financial success they desire. They simply cannot get out of their own way, and even more alarming, they are now also getting in the way of their children’s own futures. Many of these financially obese parents lack the knowledge and skills to navigate their own lives, so how can they possibly expect to be a productive resource for their children’s financial literacy and personal development?

It should come as no surprise then that like most middle-aged adults today, young and emerging adults who are now graduating college are also finding it hard to find work in the marketplace after graduation. Even worse, most are not prepared and feel ill-equipped to become financially independent, since the majority of their parents and teachers lacked the knowledge required to impart this crucial financial information to these emerging adults.

The U.S. Treasury Department and the Department of Education teamed from 2010 to 2012 to assess financial literacy in U.S. high schools, and the results weren’t pretty: the average score of almost 76,900 students in 2010 was 70 percent. 2011’s testing of about 84,000 students and 2012’s of about 80,000 students were both a point lower: 69 percent. Though young people in America have struggled for decades with financial literacy, state curricula has not shifted much to address the gaps. Fewer than half of states make high school students take an economics class, and just 13 require a personal finance class, according to a 2011 survey by the Council for Economic Education. The biennial survey also shows that just 16 states require testing in economics, three fewer than in 2009. This regression is noted in the survey summary, which points out that over the past two years, the trend toward teaching on these subjects has slowed, and is “in some cases moving backwards.”

“We have a long way to go as a country,” said Secretary of Education Arne Duncan in assessing the test results from these three years. “There has been a devastating cost to a lack of attention, urgency and seriousness of taking this on,” he said, noting that the housing crisis, low savings rate and poor retirement planning all flow out of the financial literacy issue.

Yet despite all of the ongoing research and statistics, little effort or action has been taken by Washington and the nation’s Department of Education or the state Boards of Education across the country toward changing or addressing the way schools should be educating children to properly prepare them for the new financial and societal challenges that have been created by the current economic and social changes.

Back in the 1970s and 80s, young adults were required to take home economic courses as part of their junior high and high school curricula with the belief that a foundation for good economics began in the home. However, according to Karen Leonas, an expert in textile chemistry and chair of Washington State University’s Department of Apparel, Merchandising, Design and Textiles, over the past few decades many young adults have lost touch with these basic skills and principles that were once taught in many high school home economics programs around the country. She now sees many students that do not know the essentials—like balancing a check book or sewing on a button. She also believes reintroducing home economics skills back into the current curricula may be valuable in surviving the current economic situation.

bookIn my new book, Demystifying Success: Success Tools and Secrets They Don’t Teach You in High School, I have chosen to proactively educate today’s emerging adults to avoid the very financial pitfalls that are currently paralyzing and plaguing so many older adults. These young adults must be educated now with the appropriate information, tools and resources so they no longer follow blindly in the footsteps of the generations before them and perpetuate the continuing cycle of financial illiteracy in the United States. We must encourage them instead to develop new and self-reliant ways to succeed on their own terms. Moreover, we can positively impact their future personal and financial success by empowering emerging adults during their early, formative years to begin to think entrepreneurially and independently toward make better financial decisions earlier in their lives.

Like the home economics and typing classes of the 1960s and 70s that were designed to prepare young adults to enter the next phase of their lives following graduation, there must now be a concerted effort by lawmakers, educators and communities to join the movement to shift the misguided focus away from the overburdened “No Child Left Behind” standardized testing efforts toward a more productive and effective enhancing high school and college curricula that I have dubbed “Self-Economics”, which should include financial literacy (that promotes personal finance and investing and the avoidance of “financial obesity”), personal development (that promotes a more theoretical approach (“the power of why”) to learning and decision making,  and entrepreneurship (which encompasses many of the elements of my T.I.M.E. Model) in an effort for emerging adults to better compete in a new century of global uncertainty.

In order to change the future outcomes for our children today, the 2001 “No Child Left Behind” Reform Act can no longer ignore ongoing issues surrounding financial illiteracy among young and emerging adults. Lawmakers and educators must step up and take action to introduce new educational concepts, techniques, and tools within the U.S. school systems that address this erratic financial ignorance that has plagued so many older adults.

In the April, 24, 2012 USA Today article by Hadley Malcolm, “The Cost of Financial Illiteracy”, Annamaria Lusardi, an economics and accountancy professor and director of the financial literacy center at George Washington University, said, “If we live in a world where people are in charge of their own financial well-being … we have to equip people to deal with this individual responsibility.”

“Only about two-thirds (more than 2,000) of the total college and universities in the United States now offer a course in entrepreneurship. A smaller but growing number have entire sequences leading to an undergraduate minor, a master’s in entrepreneurship, or something similar,” said Judith Cone, Vice President of Entrepreneurship, Ewing Marion Kauffman Foundation.

Scott Pelley explained, during that same “60 Minutes” segment I mentioned earlier, that many of these economically affected communities like Asheboro, North Carolina, are starting to re-build themselves—not because new big companies are beginning to move back in, but because “dozens of new entrepreneurs are setting up shops because a lot of them were down on their luck and had no choice but to cook up new ideas.”

I completely agree, in this new era of “Self-Economics”, that adults of all ages must now learn or re-learn and realize that they can no longer rely on others to solve or create their desired futures.

Jeffrey Arnett, author of the 2007 book Emerging Adult: Coming of Age in the 21st Century and When Will My Grown-Up Kid Grow Up? (May, 2013), believes, “If you provide emerging adults with resources, they’re much more likely to say, ‘How can I improve my life?’”

Like Arnett, it is my intention to help raise the awareness and needed change in our schools and society so that future generations of young adults can successfully manifest and grow their own future success.

Can Making Mistakes Enhance One’s Success?

Posted on by

Recent studies have shown that over the past decade a majority of emerging adults continue to suffer from poor financial literacy, a growing trend that shows few signs for improvement. In order for young and emerging adults to be properly prepared to grow, adapt, be successful, and financially independent in this century of uncertainty, there must be a concerted effort now to incorporate personal development into their education and consciousness. It should come as no surprise that most are ill-prepared to become financially independent as the majority of their parents and teachers also lack the needed knowledge to impart this crucial financial information. Beyond the financial information many have missed out on, personal development for many emerging adults has also been hindered because they were taught to only ask, “how” and not, “why.” This has resulted in a world of “how” for them — “Just tell me how to get the job” or “how to make money” or “how to do this and I will just do it.” The “how” approach to thinking epitomizes status quo! There is no creativity in how.

As I have mentioned in several of my blogs, unfortunately young and emerging adults today have not been encouraged to ask “why”, which has affected their personal development. Many changes over the years have conspired to cripple our youths’ ability to think theoretically. Specifically, standardized testing and lack of foundational education (financial, self-esteem, time-management, etc.) by teachers and parents, along with society in general, have established that the only approach to thinking that’s necessary is a practical approach.

As a result, most practically minded young and emerging adults have simply become programmed to avoid mistakes or refrain from trying something new in their pursuits to “just get it done.” They are rarely encouraged to think creatively in new and different ways—“outside the box.”  One teacher explained to Alina Tugend, author of the New York Times article, “The Roles of Mistakes in the Classroom,” that young children have become “victims of excellence.” In her book, Better By Mistake: The Unexpected Benefits of Being Wrong, Tugend shares some enlightening research on the crucial role parents play in how their children learn and what messages they take away about mistakes. Not only did these adults do a disservice to this generation by unintentionally failing to disclose needed financial information, but these parents also fostered a fear of making mistakes within their children.

The generational backlash from the parents in being overprotective of their children was created by their own laissez faire, hands off, “latch key” upbringing. Consequently, swearing years later that “they’d do better with their own children,” this older generation has ruthlessly hovered over their children’s experiences and problems in an attempt to shelter them from life’s pains and struggles. In reality, the major outcome of their overprotective behavior has been the crippling of their child’s ability to develop tools for handling and managing life’s inherent struggles. Therein lies the irony: the biggest mistake these parents have made is the mistake of not teaching their kids that it is okay to make mistakes!

Today, these “Helicopter Parents” find themselves in financial and personal turmoil, largely due to a lack of financial knowledge and planning created by their own teachers and parents before them. These challenges were largely created by the current economic and social changes brought on by a new era of technological globalization. Is it any wonder why young and emerging adults are choosing to question and challenge the unsustainable lifestyles they were raised to believe they’d inherit in light of the societal shifts created by rapid technological advances and a constant state of change and urgency?

Young and emerging adults have been perceived as possessing “high-maintenance” and “entitled” attitudes by the very generations (Boomers and Xers) that have raised them to believe that they could get whatever they wanted. According to Bruce Tulgan, author of Not Everyone Gets A Trophy: How to Manage Generation Y, employers in today’s workplace believe that young adults are now harder to recruit, retain, and motivate than previous generations who entered the workforce before them. Tulgan adds, “They walk in the door day one with very high expectations. They walk into the workplace thinking they know more than they know, and they don’t want to pay their dues and climb the ladder.”

When I was a young adult growing up in the 1970s, life was always fair—winners received trophies and losers gained important insights from their mistakes. Mistakes allow people to look at new challenges in different ways and then draw their own conclusions from the lessons learned. To break the cycle of crippling entitlement, “Helicopter Parents” would raise more empowered adults if they stopped teaching their children that they can’t make it in life without them, or that they are too helpless to figure things out on their own. It’s time for these parents to let go and let their children live life on their own terms.

In my new book, Demystifying Success: Success Tools and Secrets They Don’t Teach You in High School, I endeavor to fill in the educational gaps for young and emerging adults (and their “Helicopter Parents”) by proactively educating them not to be afraid to ask “why”. My goal is for young adults to seek theoretically-driven outcomes that foster creativity and empower them to continually find new or improved ways to produce their desired results—while not letting fear get the best of them. I believe that if you have a group of young, confident adults who are not afraid to ask “why” because they are either not worried about  the response they are going to get back or that somebody will think they are stupid by asking “why,” they will be much more likely to be successful in their lives.

“A man can fail many times, but he isn’t a failure until he begins to blame somebody else.” ~ John Burroughs

I invite you to ask me questions here at Larry@LarryMJacobson.com if you are an admitted “Helicopter Parent” who is either afraid to let go or not sure how to—or if you are the child of one of these parents who wants to find ways to help your parent let go of you. I also invite young and emerging adults to inquire further about the “power of why”, as well as my T.I.M.E. (Timing, Intentions, Motivation and Empowerment) Model toward growing your future success.

 

Demystifying the Obvious

Posted on by

As a young adult growing up between the ages of 16 and 25, you are the first generation to grow up in the 21st century amidst the advent of a new technological era that actually allows you to carry out the majority of your consumer-related transactions and access unlimited amounts of information and resources from your SmartPhone, computer or tablet device from virtually anywhere in the world.  Yet, despite all of the major advancements and perceived conveniences created by these new technologies, recent studies have revealed that many of you Emerging Adults still have no idea how to create wealth or procure jobs because your parents, teachers or universities never provided you with the ability to balance a checkbook, or acquire skills to perform a job.

According to a recent CNN article, multi-Grammy Award winning singer, Dionne Warwick, just filed for bankruptcy, citing more than $10 million in tax debt dating back to 1991. Warwick, 72, was one of the most recognizable pop voices of the 1960s, winning 5 Grammys throughout her 50-year career. Unfortunately, now she is down to her last $1,000 in cash and only owns furniture and clothing worth $1,500. At the time of her bankruptcy filing, Warwick claimed that her financial chaos was due to several consecutive years (the late ‘80s through the mid-‘90s) of negligent and gross financial mismanagement.

Like Warwick, so many adults between the ages of 40-60 continue to foolishly believe that money matters and career decisions take care of themselves. If you recall the financial crisis of 2008, ignorance was not bliss, as many of your generation have now either personally experienced or known someone close to you whose parents have lost their jobs (due to downsizing or outsourcing), could not afford to send you or your friends to college due to unforeseen financial hardship, or, even worse, had to lose their homes or apartments due to unprecedented bank foreclosures. Have I got your attention? Does this make you a little more nervous or concerned? Good! If not, it should.

Recent studies have shown that over the past decade a majority of Emerging Adults continue to suffer from poor financial literacy, a trend that shows few signs of improvement.  In my upcoming book, Growing Success: A Young Adult’s Guide to Achieving Personal and Financial Success, I provide Emerging Adults, like you, with the needed educational concepts, techniques, and tools in order to help you address the lack of financial education and personal development that many of you are not receiving in high schools and/or colleges and universities today. These are the very same skill sets that will enable you to make decisions that will positively impact your overall personal and financial success for years to come.

Many of you are probably returning from your college spring break this week, and some of you may also be close to graduating or landing your first real job in this century of uncertainty. So now is the perfect time to start asking yourself, “What do I want to do with my life?”, “How can I create and manifest the life that I really want to live?”,  “Who will I choose to surround myself with that will support my intentions?”, and others like these.  Once you begin to answer these important questions, you can then start taking the necessary steps to begin to make things really happen!

I have often believed that one’s ability to truly create wealth and find a job that truly sparks and inspires one’s passion is the single greatest road to success. As I have shared before, there should be at least one of three reasons why you should consider pursuing an ideal job:

1. Quality of Life – Find a job that allows you to live in a location where you can thrive. Identify a job that lets you live the life you want surrounded by the people who support and admire you.

2. Challenge Yourself – Pursue a job or career where the work will challenge or motivate you, while also allowing you to grow from your experiences, and

3. Financial Reward – I intentionally listed this pursuit last. Don’t get me wrong, I am all for finding a career path that rewards you for all your hard work and efforts, but I just don’t believe that money should be the sole driving force for why you choose to pursue a job or career. Money should be viewed as opportunity, your financial means for continuing to pursue your passions. I honestly believe that if you follow your true passion, the money will definitely follow.

You can no longer rely on others to fix your problems or create your opportunities.

It is imperative that you not blindly follow in the footsteps of the generations before you.

You must begin developing new ways to succeed on your own terms so you can begin to make better decisions earlier in your life that will positively impact your future personal and financial success.

I am confident that if you take the time and find the courage to educate yourself now so you can learn and incorporate good financial habits from an early age (e.g. reading books and articles, attending webinars, etc.,), you will enhance your odds for growing your success.

Keep Your Life Simple. Fill It with Knowledge, not Stuff

Posted on by

The other day I received a somewhat panicked phone call from a close friend. She asked if I wouldn’t mind providing her son who is graduating from college in May with some sound personal and financial advice before he leaves his so-called “bubble” (e.g., his college campus). She has been reading my blogs lately, and she is very concerned that her son did not acquire the necessary tools and resources needed to pursue his desired outcomes during his college years. Even more so, she is concerned about his capacity to succeed and live a happy life as a result.

My friend is not wrong. I am continuously mystified by the lack of attention, detail and pride many people have nowadays for their jobs and lives. I read a great quote from Warren Buffett recently that said, “The most important thing to invest in is yourself. Very few people get the horsepower out of their life that they possess. Just imagine you’re 16 and I was going to give you any car you wanted-but with only one catch: it’s the only car you’ll get, has to last you the rest of your life. How would you treat it?”

We are all living in the greatest technological era, where information is more available and abundant than ever. So why, for a country that prides itself on its technological and educational advances, are so many of these adults in such financial chaos? I believe it is because most adults were never taught from an early age to educate themselves financially, and now, as a result, they suffer from what I like to call financial obesity: one’s obsessive and self-sabotaging need to constantly overspend and remain financially unhealthy. Like the overweight, these unaware adults spend money in the same way unhappy and unhealthy people eat.

Back in the 1960s, cigarette companies were forced to start placing health warnings on cigarette packaging in order to intentionally inform the public of the risks and unhealthy consequences that could result from smoking. Yet, despite the medical evidence, people continue to ignore the health risks and smoke anyway.

Consider today your financial health warning: failure to educate yourself on the potentially devastating effects caused by financial obesity may impact your future financial well-being. I already know that, despite my repeated warnings, several of you will continue to take financial risks that will ultimately sabotage your greatest asset: YOU!

In order to avoid the very pitfalls and repetitive patterns associated with financial obesity, as young and emerging adults between the ages of 16-25, you need to begin asking yourself now, “Who am I really?” If you are a graduating college senior and you still cannot answer this question, all hope is not lost! Like Warren Buffett said, YOU are your own greatest asset! Not your car, your great looks, your G.P.A., your parents, or family name. None of these are as valuable as YOU are, including your opportunity to choose right here and right now to start making smart, probable choices that align well with your core values and desired future outcomes.

In my upcoming book, Growing Success: A Young Adult’s Guide to Personal and Financial Success, I spend a lot of time proactively educating young and emerging adults on not only the importance of financial education, but also on the important concepts, resources, and tools, such as my T.I.M.E. model (Timing, Intentions, Motivation and Empowerment), to help high school and college students enhance their knowledge and confidence in the areas of personal finance, decision-making, and most importantly, personal development before they graduate so they can properly build their personal and financial success.

So, here is the advice that I gave my friend’s son the other night: Keep your life simple. Fill it with knowledge, not stuff. Your ability to write and communicate well with others, especially potential employers, is essential. Make sure that you take some courses on speaking and writing (text messages and emails do not count as writing). That way, you will be prepared for any potential opportunity that may arise. Toastmasters International or Dale Carnegie training courses can provide you with speaking experience and also, simultaneously, support you with becoming more comfortable when you speak in front of others. My additional advice included the suggestion to seek out role models that you can start emulating. Figure out what they do, and how they got that way. Understand why you admire them and why you would select them as role models for you. The sooner you figure out “who you really are,” the sooner you will become a great subject matter expert of your own life.

“We make such messes in this life, both accidently and on purpose. But wiping the surface clean doesn’t really make anything any neater. It just masks what is below. It’s only when you really dig deep, go underground, that you can see who you are really are.” ~ Sarah Dessen

My simple suggestion for those of you who are in a similar position as my friend’s son and getting ready to graduate from college: do not follow the generations before you that unknowingly or foolishly compromised, blamed others, or enabled themselves to make bad decisions either out of laziness or pure ignorance. You can be different! Start surrounding yourself with positive people today, those who you can learn from and who can help you get where you want to go.

You have just received your first “financial health warning,” one that is intended to help you grow your success.

Growing Success as an Emerging Adult

Posted on by

In 2005, Gallup surveyed 13- to 17-year-olds and asked them what they are most afraid of? “Fear of failure or of not succeeding in life” was listed as number four, after terrorism, spiders and death. “Making mistakes that will mess up my life”; “not being successful”; “not measuring up”; “not getting into a good college”; “I’ll close doors on myself and find myself in a position where I can’t succeed because of something I’m doing right now”; “fear of failing in life in general — not achieving the goals I have set for myself” and “not leaving a mark” were the biggest concerns expressed by the teens that participated.

In 1996 when I was 32 years old, I decided to email President Bill Clinton at the White House about the four core subjects that I believed should be taught in every high school that would help address the majority of these teenagers’ fears.  Shortly thereafter, I received a response letter back from the President thanking me for my suggestions. Unfortunately, nothing became of it. Then in 2008, when the economy almost went into another financial depression, I began to realize the underlying reason why so many adults between the ages of 40 and 60 are in such economic chaos, and I began following my passion for speaking and educating young and “Emerging Adults,” ages 16-25, in the areas of personal and financial success.

 Dr. Jeffrey Arnett, Research Professor at Clark University (Worchester, Massachusetts), describes this demographic (Emerging Adults) as the period between 18 and 25 years of age where adolescents become more independent and explore various life possibilities. Arnett said in 2006 that given some emerging adults’ struggles, he sees the need for greatly expanded societal efforts to help them navigate the transition into careers and family. He believes such efforts would pay off, given the self-awareness people develop in their 20s and their willingness to change. “If you provide them with resources, they’re much more likely to say, “How can I improve my life?” At that time, he hoped that his book, Emerging Adults in America: Coming of Age in the 21st Century, would build a community of scholars devoted to studying the “emerging adult” period of development.

As Founding President of the Society for the Study of Emerging Adulthood (SSEA.org), Arnett is focused on finding theories and encouraging research related to emerging adults (ages 18 – 29 years). The primary goal of the Society is to advance the understanding of development in emerging adulthood through scholarship, education, training, policy and practice.

In July 2012, USA Today reported that Clark University commissioned a national survey for adults ages 18-29 (dubbed emerging adults) as part of an ongoing study, and the top two answers to the question asked in the survey about what respondents felt was the MOST important factor for becoming an adult were accepting responsibility for yourself and becoming financially independent. The cost of financial illiteracy was the topic of another USA TODAY article in April 2012, which stated that studies show that a majority of young people in the United States have poor financial literacy, a trend that has been consistent over the past decade and shows few signs of improving. In this article, Annamaria Lusardi, an economics and accountancy professor and director of the financial literacy center at George Washington University, said, “If we live in a world where people are in charge of their own financial well-being … we have to equip people to deal with this individual responsibility.”

Steven Bahls, President of Augustana College believes that colleges and universities should do a better job in providing “more education about financial literacy and the practical aspects of living in today’s world.”  In his 2011 Inside Higher Ed article, “Time to Teach Financial Literacy,” he revealed insights he gained from conversations with graduates who confided their frustrating lack of ‘real-world’ financial knowledge. “Our graduates can’t create wealth and jobs if they don’t have the ability to balance a checkbook, or the skills to hold a job.”

In my new book, Demystifying Success: Success Tools and Secrets They Don’t Teach You in High School, I inspire and motivate Emerging Adults to help them not only pursue their life-long goals on their own terms, but also to define a practical approach to understanding the purpose behind what will manifest their future success. The book is intended to educate young and Emerging Adults, as well as adults of all ages, about the secrets of concrete personal goals/plans, which will allow them to become one of the fortune 10% of the population who understand solid financial habits.

This past January, I appeared as a contributing co-author alongside Deepak Chopra and Suzi Pomerantz in the #1 international best-selling book, Ready, Aim, Captivate: Put Magic In Your Message and a Fortune in Your Future. In my chapter interview, I discuss the personal and professional challenges that I had to overcome as I rose to the top of my professional field. I also shared how I created my speaking platform for the next generation of young and Emerging Adults including tools and resources to help them manage their fears while also taking the necessary action steps needed to successfully accomplish their goals.

As a member of SSEA, I am looking forward to joining Jeffrey, Steven and the rest of the Society in educating emerging adults to become more successful by providing them with the resources and tools (such as my T.I.M.E. model) to grow their success.

Tunnel of Transition

Posted on by

“When someone says ‘you’ve changed,’ it simply means you’ve stopped living your life their way.” This is an interesting quote that I read this week, and it got me thinking about life shifts and transformations. One of the hardest yet most enlightening moments in a person’s life is when they finally decide to leave their unhealthy comfort zone and change the things in their lives that are no longer working.

In one of my recent blogs, I shared that my “a-ha moment” and my personal transformation toward success started with a simple question, “So, how is that life working for you?” As I have explained in that post, this was a simple question that really required me to be honest with myself and address those things in my life that were no longer supporting my desired probable outcomes for success. No excuses and no blame necessary; just me agreeing to take complete ownership of my life, right at that moment.

What I quickly came to realize was that I was no longer pursuing my passions and goals, but instead found myself surrounded by unhealthy people (e.g., emotional parasites) that did not support me and who did not have my best interests at heart. I recognized that I was simply making excuses as to why my life went off course, while at the same time continuing to enable my own bad decisions rather than deal with my immediate despair. Let’s face it: I had a bad case of mood-poisoning.

When I first began to write my upcoming book, Growing Success: A Young Adult’s Guide to Personal and Financial Success, I had to ask myself a lot of difficult questions. It forced me to reflect on how and, more importantly, why I allowed myself to feel this way. Once I began to own the decisions and mistakes I had made, I started to re-claim my life. I soon began to realize that the awakening (e.g., the realization) phase of the transformation process was relatively simple. Through my own heightened awareness, I started to identify my bad behaviors including the negative programming and emotions I was feeling and projecting, as well as the re-alignment of my goals and probable outcomes. I did this by letting go of the people who had been unhealthy influences in my life and about my goals… It was exciting and reinvigorating. I was starting to become stronger as I felt things shifting. Then, as if I was running a marathon, I hit the wall. It was my tunnel of transition.

I define this “tunnel” as that uncomfortable phase of the transformation that resides between awakening and the new paradigm (e.g., the shift). And just like traveling through a real tunnel, at times it can feel claustrophobic. The darkness and uncertainty often trigger the anxious feelings you may get when you start to feel overwhelmed, especially when you begin questioning all the negative behaviors and obstacles you will have to overcome in order to break out of your current unhealthy comfort zone.

Despite these feelings of anxiety, I can assure you it is worth your efforts. As you enter your “tunnel,” you will need to remind yourself that you have chosen this new path for a reason; “your old life didn’t work anymore.”  If you choose to be patient, focused and disciplined, the discomfort you are likely to encounter on your personal transformation will result in your desired probable outcome of achieving success.

I am extremely fortunate that I did not allow fear and uncertainty to derail me from my new life. I had to persist until I found the light at the end of my tunnel. As a result, I was able to figure out how to re-align my future goals with my desired outcomes. I felt compelled to share the necessary steps you will most likely need to take if you choose to do this for yourself through these blog posts and in my upcoming book.

I hope I can inspire you as well to commit to growing your own future success.

Have Nerds Become the New Cool in the 21st Century?

Posted on by

I was recently lecturing to a class of students at Indiana University when it suddenly dawned on me: are Nerds really becoming the new cool for the 21st Century? During my lecture, I kept referring to one’s need to be self-aware, which I believe is crucial for enhancing one’s chances for success.

Unlike “Cools”, Nerds tend to be more authentic to themselves. They are not as concerned about what people think. They are more focused on how they choose to present themselves to others. Their intelligence and skills (e.g. abilities), not their fashion, dictate their identities.

Nerds pay attention to the details! They are not afraid to ask “why”. In fact, Nerds thrive on understanding ”the why” and occupy themselves with challenging the status quo, especially if something no longer makes sense, or even worse, becomes obsolete. “Cools” are way too concerned about “how” something will be perceived or “how” they will continue to “keep up with the Jones.” As a result, the “Cools” waste a lot of unnecessary energy trying to impress others, or even worse, trying to attract superficial professional and personal relationships that they cannot cultivate because they are constantly trying to maintain or improve their status or image instead of learning about the new things Nerds are already plugged into.

Nerds, on the other hand, attract like-minded people and choose to participate in groups and clubs because of common goals and a shared purpose. As a result, Nerds inspire and support each others’ successes.  They seek deeper meaning and connection with others, while at the same time, growing their network of potential employers, employees and business partners.

Nerds commit, they plan, and quite often execute their visions and goals, which is why so-many “Nerds” continue to attain such success within this new century of uncertainty.  They succeed because they choose to plan and thrive to be distinct. In his book, What They Don’t Teach You in the Harvard Business School, Mark McCormack asks why only 3% of all the Harvard MBAs make ten times as much as the remaining 97% combined. From his research he surmised that having clear, written goals for the future and creating plans to accomplish them was truly the underlying formula for their success.

In 1979, interviewers spoke with new graduates from the Harvard’s MBA Program and concluded:

  • 84% had no specific goals at all
  • 13% had goals but they were not committed to paper
  • 3% had clear, written goals and plans to accomplish them

In 1989, interviewers once again spoke with Harvard MBA graduates and:

  • The 13% of the class who had goals were earning, on average, twice as much as the 84 percent who had no goals at all.
  • Even more staggering – the three percent who had clear, written goals were earning, on average, ten times as much as the other 97 percent put together.

In my upcoming book, Growing Success: A Young Adult’s Guide for Achieving Personal and Financial Success, I discuss several tools and models that address planning and goal-setting, as well as awareness and good decision-making, which are imperative for enhancing one’s probable outcomes for success.

Look around and take notice! Nerds HAVE become the new cool. Just ask Sheldon, Leonard, Howard and Raj, the cast of the hit television series, The Big Bang Theory. The cast and writers have made being nerdy cool.

So the next time you find yourself sitting next to a so-called “Nerd” in class, you better befriend him or her quickly because there is going to be a good chance that in next 10-20 years they will become your star employee, partner or BOSS.

As for me, I simply choose to embrace my inner “Cool Nerd” and continue to dedicate my time to helping you grow your success.